1) Slink Ashton, lead singer of the gutter-punk combo Night Shit
2) Crag Magnanagnum, the only survivor of Wienerschnitzel '87
3) Alan Arson, the lead singer of a generic punk band from a John Hughes movie called The Flaming Snots or whatever
4) Microphone Elliott, who first uttered the sentence "If you remember the 60's you weren't there", then immediately wished they hadn't because ugh
5) Kegger Freethru, still trying to use a catcher's mitt as an aphrodisiac
6) Stick Boog, who walked into the WRONG hotel banquet room and is now covered in mucus
7) Famous rapper MC Kinda Creeped Out By Their New College Roommate Who Keeps Pictures of Amish Women in a Shoebox
8) Sashay Elton, waiting for you outside the Value Village change room while you try on track pants and yelling "It's not you, track pants are made smaller these days"
9) Jafe Worthyfox, not exactly crazy about how close their name is to Jeff Foxworthy, although it gets them free chicken-fried steak at all Bonanza Family Restaurants
10) King Loofa, pioneer in the subgenre "bath-dub"