Friday 27 July 2012

LISTONI: Ten Things You Shouldn't Say When Someone Tells You They Love You

1) "Don't ask me how, but I managed to figure that out from sifting through your garbage."

2) "I'm afraid I'm already married to the sea. Whoops, I mean "The C", famed hip-hop producer and clothing designer."

3) "You still haven't seen through the facade? Huh. Thought you were smarter than that."

4) "Well, in turn, I am in love with the IDEA of loving you."

5) "Love is a capitalist construct. Is there any way I can make a lot of money from you loving me?"

6) "I knew it. Is it my jogging shorts and the tightness thereof?"

7) "Whoa whoa, stop what you're saying right now. Shut up. I just came up with a great lyric. 'You love me, but I don't love you/I laugh to myself at what you're going through...'"

8) "That is interesting, as I have been gored in the love muscle by the bull of wanting to have sex with you."

9) "Cool, can you take a look at my Law and Order:Special Victims Unit spec script and tell me if it's stupid enough?"

10) "I'm sorry, what? I didn't catch what you said the last six months."

No comments:

Post a Comment